In the Life

Has no one ever told you how much blogging sucks?
Okay, so blogging doesn't suck. But think about it. You're putting your entire life-no, more than that...your self-for the world to see and judge. People can look at you and say, "Oh, you're not very interesting." One click will drive them away from the webpage you worked so hard to create. Or, worse, they'll say, "Hmm..." and keep reading. They shall see into the depths of your soul, the things you have succeeded in hiding from everyone else but them. It's them, the readers, who will know you best. They will know how you feel on the inside, what makes you tick, and all the things you hate. You are putting yourself on display for the world. "Take me as I am," you say.
The problem with me? I don't like this. I don't want to open myself up for the entire world to judge, to look at. I hate this. I hate scrutiny. I love acting, but I hate getting up in front of crowds to be someone else. I barely like being myself before strangers. I wake up each day and say to that horrible face in the mirror, "I hate you." When I feel snubbed or ignored by those around me, I say to myself, "You have no friends." I find it hard to smile or be happy. I find it hard to be anything other than sad. If an emotion takes me over, it is depression.
For the most part, I think I hate me. I just don't know what to do about it. I probably won't do anything.
Then again, neither will you, right? After all, I'm just some crazy girl with a blog. That's right. Let the cursor travel up the page, touch the little x in the right hand corner. Or, better yet, press the "Next Blog" button. My life is not interesting-sneak a peak at someone else's. Laugh a little, then leave your computer completely. Oh, you may think about me once or twice, but not for long.
And that's okay. Because blogging sucks.